Prelims have started, well its just the English paper. But the other papers officially start this Thursday. Well well, what have I been doing. I’ve spent my entire weekend, plus Friday, on Youtube watching Korean videos. Video after video, I keep telling myself I’ll study after this video but it obviously, DOES NOT WORK ):< I feel so angry at myself right now.

Family outing/WGM/Infinity Challenge/Idol Army/Star King/One Night Two Days.. Have been keeping me reallyyyyyy busy ): Plus all the K Pop, I’ve been going absolutely nuts, seriously. I think my procastination hasn’t been this bad since.. Jay? And TheJayPeriod wasn’t even this bad. The BOF period wasn’t that bad either! But it introduced to me the art of watching videos online HAHA SHEESH. This is the worst. OH MY OH MY I’M SO DEAD FOR PRELIMS.

I’m gonna surrender my laptop tomorrow, since thats the stupid machine thats torturing me. SIGH on a lighter note, Family Outing has been giving me abs, though they’re not exactly visible, I can feel them HAHA. Its so hilariousssss, freaking love the show. Yejin and Chunhee’s farewell so sad though, cried buckets ): The new episodes just aren’t the same without Chunderella and Miss Savage ):

Alright, I’m off to watch the last episode of the day before going to bed, haha. Tomorrow is study day!!! I PROMISE. (I say this every night before going to bed)

Oh yes, did I mention my new found love for DBSK. HAHA THEY’RE SO FREAKING SEXY, AND THEY HAVE NICE SONGS HEHE (: So unlike other boy bands which just look good but can’t really sing. Oh I love Big Bang though!!! Daesung/T.O.P <3

Sigh okay I sound like a crazy Korean fanatic. I will try and control myself, till O’s end. I’ll try. When O’s are over…

HAHA

K Pop has been keeping me alive, no less. DBSK/2PM/FT Island/2NE1/SNSD/BIG BANG/SUJU etcetc. HAHA yeah that pretty much just summed up my week. Life has been hellll boring.

H1N1 sucks, big time. I’ve been feeling so weak and lethargic. I feel like I have no more muscles in my body and I pant after climbing up stairs, STAIRS ._. Its sad, really. I feel like I have no more stamina, like zero.

I don’t really have the mood to blog anymore, Prelims start this week, but its only english. Plus National Day holidays, thats about it. I wanna bowl!

):

CALL YOUR NAME.

I haven’t felt so nostalgic for such a long time. I feel disgusting and nothing is helping, not even ice cream ): I don’t even know why I’m feeling this way. Is there more to it, or am I just making things up.

I don’t know if what I’m feeling right now is normal, I have these feelings almost all the time but somehow I can’t bring myself to come to terms with it. I keep trying to convince myself that there are better things out there, how was I to know that I wouldn’t be able to let go. How was I supposed to know, when you didn’t tell me?

I want to fall back and you’d be there to catch me, I want you to be there for me, again. Its been so long since I’ve felt this way all over again. I know I’ve successfully buried it inside of me, but why does it feel as though its resurfacing all over again and I have absolutely no control over it. I hate how you make me feel as though I can’t control myself and I’m like a idiot in front of you.

Everytime I think about this, I feel even worse about myself. I know its never going to happen, I know its not possible but somehow you always give me a tinge of hope. Its as if you still care, maybe its just me.

I want to talk to someone so badly, so badly. But I don’t know who to talk to.
Because I feel like an idiot not being able to let go.

I have a sudden urge to blog, nothing much has been happening. Dinner yesterday was pretty alright I guess, supposed to go out with Darsh Ka and Fen after that but the movie timings sucked so decided to leave. Waited for mum to reach, took like forever omg. Called Barbie and talked to him, walked till my feet bled. HAHA sheesh I was like squatting in the middle of nowhere everyone was staring at me, ugh. But I had an awesome time talking to Barbie, HAHA what a retard. Was trying to reply emails on my phone and talk to him at the same time. I LOVE MY BLACKBERRY BECAUSE I CAN ACCESS MY EMAIL ANYWHERE, thank God for that (:

Spent the whole day sleeping, kind of. Woke up and went down to play Guitar Hero with Jie and Kor, I suck at drums man. HAHA attempted to use the mic, but we couldn’t connect it, I don’t know why. So just played drums and the other two guitars. KOREAN DINNER TONIGHT! (: Haha, awesomeee. I’ve been eating so much lately ugh.

After school on Friday went out with Jadey, Shan and Aly. We had a sudden craving for Tony Romas during school so we just decided to go after school. Cabbed back and got ready for the dinner thing. HAHA lunch was awesome! I miss talking to Aly so much, she’s become so bim. Then went to buy Monopoly cards, bwahaha. Played around in Toysrus, then left. (: We have to do this again some time soon! <3

I feel like getting a new diary. I hate my current one. The book is so difficult to hold open and the cover is super dirty ): I wanna go paperchase but then I’m too lazy ugh. I want to get new pens as well, KINO! ): I still haven’t gotten my pullover, I know I know, Singapore is so hot, what do I need it for. Singapore may be hot, but my room is freaking freezing HAHA. I like it that way (:

I’m gonna bathe now byeeee.

Had a pretty good day at school today, cause laoshi didn’t come to school, again. Awesome, I hope she doesn’t come tomorrow either, then no chinese for the whole week! Bwahaha. Ohwell, went to the library during free period(s) today, watched the disgusting KBox video, omg.

Nothing much happening this week, training resumes tomorrow (FINALLY) I think I forgot how to bowl. Friday night, victory banquet at American Club, I have absolutely nothing to wear. But I can’t really be bothered, I’ll think about it some other time, I’ve got better things to think about.

I was just thinking about everything, and I’ve concluded that maybe I should try to accept people for who they are, because they might think the same way about me yet they are able to accept me for who I am. But I, on the other hand, keep picking on their flaws, and choose not to look at the better side of them, I need to change.

There’s so much worth living for, yet I can’t find the reasons to right now. I know there are many other things in life I have not experienced, but then again, what am I missing out on? Nothing much. I keep having these ‘what if’ thoughts go through my mind, sometimes I even feel as though they’re true, but then when reality sinks in, I know that there are things I can’t change, and things that won’t come true. And then there are things that I have to accept.

Should I? Or should I not.

I don’t know if I’m an extremely happy girl right now, or just an extremely depressed one. Just depends from what angle you look at it from I guess. And knowing myself, I’m definitely not very happy right now. But ohwell, good things happened  

AYG is finally over and our bowlers did awesome I must say, had lots of fun cheering for all of them. I’ve learnt a few things from this AYG: 

1. Have more sportsmanship (that is for sure)
2. How much my Korean sucks
3. How to let go.

Its quite random actually, but it kinda makes sense when I type it out, well to me of course. I think there’s this on-off thing I need to learn how to get over, I’m just hoping it goes away fast. I can’t say I’m not enjoying it, or didn’t enjoy it, I just wish it never happened, things would be simpler that way.

I love the rain, I love the smell of rain, it calms me down and totally takes my mind off things. Why does it feel harder and harder each time. I have no idea why, but then again maybe from now, it’ll get easier and easier. Its only a matter of time, besides, I’ve done/got what I could. So I guess this is where it ends.

HAHA, I think its time I look at the brighter side. I feel like a little child, but then again, it makes me happy so whatever. It’ll be over in a few days, just give me a few days.

I’m off to do homework or I’m gonna get screwed tomorrow byeee.

DAEHAMINGO!

DAEHAMINGO!

DAEHAMINGO!

DAEHAMINGO!

UGH, there’s so much I want to complain about and bitch about omg. Seriously, I know its none of my business but I feel so disgusted with our own country, if we’re meant to win, then we’re meant to win. I don’t understand why they have to resort to such methods to win. I mean seriously, if we have what it takes, we’ll win. You think people can’t see what you are trying to do?! Its just that can’t say anything cause its our homeground. If its our homeground, all the more you should know your limits. There are things we can do and things we can’t. I dont understand why you can’t see this is totally wrong. I’m seriously getting irritated with people who can’t think the same way I do. 

Now I dont even feel any tinge of happiness when our country wins, because I know we don’t deserve it at all. I don’t know what goes through your mind. UGH I AM SO ANNOYED, STUPIDDDD. Just let me ramble and whine and complain because I am seriously so pissed. They deserved the win much more than us, so much more. I don’t understand why you have to go resort to such means (I know I repeated, but SERIOUSLY) Annoying, I was so embarrassed to even be seen cheering for us. Even if someone else told you to do it, doesn’t mean you have to do it. If you know its wrong, then don’t pass down the message. Doing it, means you agree with what they are doing. The only motive you should have when you are cheering is to want to support your country and encourage your country to keep them going, but what has it become now, you use it to distract other teams. Honestly, you were once a sports person, shouldn’t you have, even if its just a little, sportsmanship?! 

Sigh, I guess not.

Farewell, Michael Jackson.

I suddenly have so many things to blog about I don’t know where to start. Michael Jackson passed away three days ago, I didn’t really feel much. It didn’t really hit me that he’ll never perform again, in front of the millions of fans who simply adore him. He was a legend, nothing less. He made history and nobody is going to forget him anytime soon.

It was only last night when I was watch MTV and they were showing a series of Michael Jackson’s music videos, it was then when I realised how he used to play such a huge part in my childhood. Kor and I used to try and dance along to his music videos, failing terribly of course. How his song was the first song I actually cried after listening to it, how his songs had everyone on their feet and moving to the beat. How his concerts practically brought the whole world together as one.

He was the King of Pop, but the scandals came of course, only after his death did Evan Chandler come forward and clear MJ’s name, saying that his father had made him tell lies to the police so that they could get out of poverty. Michael Jackson will never be forgotten, not now not ever. He has changed the world, changed some people’s lives, for the better. I know he’s gone now, but his words will remain forever.

Heal The World
Make It A Better Place
For You And For Me
And The Entire Human Race
There Are People Dying
If You Care Enough
For The Living
Make A Better Place
For You And For Me

Had a pretty rough day/night/week whatever. I didn’t hate it that much at first, but now looking back, I realised how stupid and foolish I looked, I honestly thought you were different. I thought maybe, just maybe, you’d be different from the rest. Turns out you’re not only just like them, maybe you’re just ten times worse. I really don’t know what I should be feeling right now, a tinge of resentment? Or a heart filled with hatred directed at you? Because right now, what I feel isn’t just a tinge, I feel like slapping you so badly.

I don’t know how you can be two people at one time, I don’t know how you can act in front of me as if you did nothing wrong. Who are you, really. I’ve never asked myself that until now. Have you even cared about what your actions would bring about? You’ve only cared for yourself haven’t you, the feelings of others has never entered your mind. I won’t say I hate you, because its probably in your nature I don’t give a shit. What you did only made her regret, you made her regret her decision to help. Sometimes, I really wonder what goes through your stupid brain.

Isn’t blood supposed to be thicker than water? Then why are you doing this, I don’t understand. Do you feel better about yourself doing this, does it make you feel more matured? I’m sorry if it does make you feel that way, because your actions have only made us seen the childish, immature side of you that I wish you had not shown us. I used to respect you, a hell lot, until you started doing things that I didn’t like. That your family didn’t like, but you did it anyway, only thinking about yourself and what you want. Did you ever thing about your parents? They have to mentally prepare themselves, prepare themselves as they may be losing a son anytime soon. What have you become, I don’t want to know, but then again, you don’t have to answer me, you don’t have anything to prove to me, afterall I’m nothing to you.

I think this week has just been sucking because I’m being so irritated with people who can’t see things from my point of view and I don’t know why. I keep asking myself why can’t people think like that? Why must they do things like that. I’m getting so annoyed, really. Even with things I’m not supposed to interfere in, before I know it, I’m getting my hands dirty.

I think I’m getting some kind of disorder.

JADEY; PORKHEAD.

AWESOME FOUR <3

(:

HAHA there are still the photos from the ‘Pregnant Ladies go to School’ but I am lazy to upload them. K box was awesome fun with the spastic and crazy four I had a really really great time, haha. All the craziness jam packed into one small K Box room was really suffocating. But.. we totally have to do this again

I miss them so much Part of me can’t wait for school to reopen, the other part is dying for school to not reopen. When I say dying, I mean DYING. Haha sheesh Why didn’t MOH just extend our holiday  

Gonna watch Transformers today! Can’t wait, Megan Fox is freaking hotttt HEH. Not much to blog about, again. Everything is so boring. Ugh. I want to sleep

He's still love <3

I know I know, I haven’t been updating at all but I’ve just been too lazy to update HAHA. So things have been pretty alright, bowling camp wasn’t that much of a disaster and all. 

Though school was cancelled, I haven’t made much progress in holiday homework, how depressing Although I’ve finished A Math and almost finished E Math and Physics probably, there’s still loads more to go. Ugh I hate how school just hands out homework like they can be completed in a matter or seconds >:( Sheesh, anyways, I’ve been drama-ing constantly, of course, thats like the only thing thats keeping me alive  

Went for CP’s party yesterday, it was okay I guess? Met Girlfriend after such a long time, she has short hair+braces. Bwahaha, watched them DDR, Guitar Hero and whatnot. Just stoned around. Left pretty early, went prawning after that HAHA awesomeee. Caught like 40 prawns in 2 hours? Just the two of us  

Can’t believe school is starting next week already, why can’t they just extend the damn holiday Anyway, AYG starts next week so all the best to the bowlers HAHA, Darshini Krishna you better own all their asses. May go down to watch a few events I hope, Mum bought the tickets already so I guess I’ll be going down

Training later on, there’s not much to blog about anymore Guess I’m gonna do some e-learning then gonna bathe

You and I, collide;